I can not tell you how many times I get asked that question during any given week......."Yep, they sure are." is always my response. Most people leave it at that, but many don't. I decided after week 1, that I was not going to keep saying to total strangers that these two boys were adopted from Ukraine. I don't want Ivan and Anatoliy to keep feeling like they are 2 and we are the 5 - we are a family of 7, plain and simple - no division, just 7 family members!
I can't believe that I am writing that they have been home for almost 4 months. Time flies by so fast.... Although there are some days that I truly want to pull my hair out and get in my car and keep driving to some unknown destination, I have to say that for the most part, everyone is falling into a routine and figuring out their new places in the family.
Ivan started Hough High in the 9th grade and he is truly struggling! We aren't surprised by this but it is still hard to see him having so many problems. When he came here this summer, he didn't even know his multiplication tables, much less fractions and decimals, so throwing him into an Algebra class has been interesting to say the least. Anyone who knows me, knows that Math and I are not friends, so we both learn each lesson over while doing homework. Ivan can get so frustrated and throw his pencil and tell me how much he hates Math, but what amazes me each day is that he happily gets up for school again the next morning each and everyday. Ivan has made such strides with our family in the last three months. He is slowly getting over some food issues that we were dealing with. I can't say that I have found food in his room in a couple of weeks now!! He is trying to learn English, although not as quickly as Anatoliy has gotten it. He is trying to be able to tell the truth about different things.....last week we had caught him lying about something really not too important, but for a day he held to the fact that he had not done it...we knew he had and the next day we asked again if he wanted to come clean and tell the truth and not only did he own up to his mistake, but he came into the house on his own and said "Mom, i am sorry for lying about blah, blah, blah." This was huge for him and I was so proud of him. It is these little steps that he takes everyday with our family that shows us he wants to be here and wants to be a part of the family. My only hope is that he continue to build a trust in Matt and I. That we will always be there for him, always feed him, make sure he gets to school, make sure he can play soccer, etc. Whether a good day or a bad day, at the end of the day we are all still a family that loves each other!
Anatoliy started Bailey Middle in the 7th grade and is honestly doing ok. He has mostly C's, which is great for not knowing the language. His teachers seem to love him and he is making some friends along the way. He tends to act pretty immature for his age, but again this was to be expected. It can definitely get frustrating hearing a 14 year old talk in a little kid voice!! But I am now really trying to correct the behavior when i see it and try to point it out, b/c I am not so sure he even realizes it.
The boys have definitely had their fair share of doctor appts. They have each visited the ER and had stitches. Toliy in his leg and Ivan in his finger! Back and forth to the pediatrician for vaccines. Matt's cousin's husband is a dentist in Roanoke and he graciously offered his time to fix some of the boys dental problems. Ivan had 5 cavities that needed to be fixed and Toliy had an abscessed tooth that still needs a root canal! We were so thankful for Griffin's generosity, b/c we just can not seem to catch a break on medical bills lately!! Between ER visits, orthodontist visits, orthopedic surgeon for Ivan's finger, our youngest William getting metal in his eye and having to see an optometrist three days in a row, and dental visits....we have not been able to pay off this adoption debt as quickly as we would have liked! And let's be honest, feeding 5 boys is NOT cheap:) Plus I am learning all about teenager style and what is in and what is not....let's just say that if it in "in" it is not cheap!
I do have to say that I have become quite the little cook for our family! Eating out just isn't an option at this point, so I have been trying lots of new recipes and the crock pot is my new best friend. I can't even tell you how much food we go through in this house in one week! It is truly incredible. Alex and William aren't even really big eaters yet, so it will only get worse. UGH!
We took the boys apple picking up in the mountains and that was lots of fun. There are very few weekends where we can just take off on a Sunday and go to the mountains, so it was very nice to get away and enjoy each other. Ivan and Toliy were truly monkeys when climbing to get the apples. They would go all the way to the top of the tree just to get one special apple that they saw!
Many of you have asked, how Matt and I are doing. First of all, thank you for asking and second we are doing OK. We both are a little mentally wiped out at this point, but I am hoping that as the year progresses, things will lighten up and we will catch a little break. Having a sitter right now isn't an option, so that has been the biggest change for us, never having a break from the kids. Actually, we did have one night back in August where a friend of ours took the boys to the pool for a few hours and we went out to eat sushi, just the two of us! It was really very nice. Those types of nights are just much more limited for us right now. Matt goes out with his friends when he can and I see mine when I can - it all seems to work out.
Each day I watch these boys grow. I see their potential and desire to learn. Not only learn academics, but also learn how to live in a family. How to respect boundaries, how to share, how to take care of yourself on a daily level. I can not tell you how many things Matt and I have been surprised that these boys have no idea about. Manners has been a big learning process for them, cutting food, not slurping food, not shoveling food in your mouth, saying please and thank you (actually they get the thank you very well, but please could use some help:)
I will say that his has been the most challenging "job" that I have ever had! I know that I am "working" for a good cause......This experience has made me a better mother to all of our boys. I am learning much more patience than I ever knew I had....this is where you would hear Matt chuckle in the background...b/c although I may have patience with the boys, I definitely vent to Matt each night about something! I guess it is all about perspective - right? Matt and I are really looking forward to sharing the holidays with Ivan and Toliy. I can't wait for them to experience Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas time!
I can't believe that I am writing that they have been home for almost 4 months. Time flies by so fast.... Although there are some days that I truly want to pull my hair out and get in my car and keep driving to some unknown destination, I have to say that for the most part, everyone is falling into a routine and figuring out their new places in the family.
Ivan started Hough High in the 9th grade and he is truly struggling! We aren't surprised by this but it is still hard to see him having so many problems. When he came here this summer, he didn't even know his multiplication tables, much less fractions and decimals, so throwing him into an Algebra class has been interesting to say the least. Anyone who knows me, knows that Math and I are not friends, so we both learn each lesson over while doing homework. Ivan can get so frustrated and throw his pencil and tell me how much he hates Math, but what amazes me each day is that he happily gets up for school again the next morning each and everyday. Ivan has made such strides with our family in the last three months. He is slowly getting over some food issues that we were dealing with. I can't say that I have found food in his room in a couple of weeks now!! He is trying to learn English, although not as quickly as Anatoliy has gotten it. He is trying to be able to tell the truth about different things.....last week we had caught him lying about something really not too important, but for a day he held to the fact that he had not done it...we knew he had and the next day we asked again if he wanted to come clean and tell the truth and not only did he own up to his mistake, but he came into the house on his own and said "Mom, i am sorry for lying about blah, blah, blah." This was huge for him and I was so proud of him. It is these little steps that he takes everyday with our family that shows us he wants to be here and wants to be a part of the family. My only hope is that he continue to build a trust in Matt and I. That we will always be there for him, always feed him, make sure he gets to school, make sure he can play soccer, etc. Whether a good day or a bad day, at the end of the day we are all still a family that loves each other!
Anatoliy started Bailey Middle in the 7th grade and is honestly doing ok. He has mostly C's, which is great for not knowing the language. His teachers seem to love him and he is making some friends along the way. He tends to act pretty immature for his age, but again this was to be expected. It can definitely get frustrating hearing a 14 year old talk in a little kid voice!! But I am now really trying to correct the behavior when i see it and try to point it out, b/c I am not so sure he even realizes it.
The boys have definitely had their fair share of doctor appts. They have each visited the ER and had stitches. Toliy in his leg and Ivan in his finger! Back and forth to the pediatrician for vaccines. Matt's cousin's husband is a dentist in Roanoke and he graciously offered his time to fix some of the boys dental problems. Ivan had 5 cavities that needed to be fixed and Toliy had an abscessed tooth that still needs a root canal! We were so thankful for Griffin's generosity, b/c we just can not seem to catch a break on medical bills lately!! Between ER visits, orthodontist visits, orthopedic surgeon for Ivan's finger, our youngest William getting metal in his eye and having to see an optometrist three days in a row, and dental visits....we have not been able to pay off this adoption debt as quickly as we would have liked! And let's be honest, feeding 5 boys is NOT cheap:) Plus I am learning all about teenager style and what is in and what is not....let's just say that if it in "in" it is not cheap!
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| Matt made a stop in Blacksburg with the boys to show them Virginia Tech. |
I do have to say that I have become quite the little cook for our family! Eating out just isn't an option at this point, so I have been trying lots of new recipes and the crock pot is my new best friend. I can't even tell you how much food we go through in this house in one week! It is truly incredible. Alex and William aren't even really big eaters yet, so it will only get worse. UGH!
We took the boys apple picking up in the mountains and that was lots of fun. There are very few weekends where we can just take off on a Sunday and go to the mountains, so it was very nice to get away and enjoy each other. Ivan and Toliy were truly monkeys when climbing to get the apples. They would go all the way to the top of the tree just to get one special apple that they saw!
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| Ivan's mood can change in an instant, but when he is happy and carefree, it melts my heart! |
Many of you have asked, how Matt and I are doing. First of all, thank you for asking and second we are doing OK. We both are a little mentally wiped out at this point, but I am hoping that as the year progresses, things will lighten up and we will catch a little break. Having a sitter right now isn't an option, so that has been the biggest change for us, never having a break from the kids. Actually, we did have one night back in August where a friend of ours took the boys to the pool for a few hours and we went out to eat sushi, just the two of us! It was really very nice. Those types of nights are just much more limited for us right now. Matt goes out with his friends when he can and I see mine when I can - it all seems to work out.
Each day I watch these boys grow. I see their potential and desire to learn. Not only learn academics, but also learn how to live in a family. How to respect boundaries, how to share, how to take care of yourself on a daily level. I can not tell you how many things Matt and I have been surprised that these boys have no idea about. Manners has been a big learning process for them, cutting food, not slurping food, not shoveling food in your mouth, saying please and thank you (actually they get the thank you very well, but please could use some help:)
I will say that his has been the most challenging "job" that I have ever had! I know that I am "working" for a good cause......This experience has made me a better mother to all of our boys. I am learning much more patience than I ever knew I had....this is where you would hear Matt chuckle in the background...b/c although I may have patience with the boys, I definitely vent to Matt each night about something! I guess it is all about perspective - right? Matt and I are really looking forward to sharing the holidays with Ivan and Toliy. I can't wait for them to experience Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas time!
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| Everbody wet after running from Ivan's soccer game in the rain! |
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| All of us monkeys in a tree:) |
